In the course of my exhausting dating life it would seem we're DEvolving as opposed to Evolving - at least when it comes to dating and the terminology the surrounds it.
Is the word "dating" or the act of dating, obsolete now? Have we (d)evolved into a society of casual encounters? What happened to the days of "dating", "spending time with" or actually "committing" to someone? Heaven forbid we use labels or *gasp* actually admit to liking someone!? When did these rules change?
Recently, I made the unspeakable mistake of telling a guy that "I enjoyed spending time with him," which, apparently, translated to "Code Red: RUN!" Are we not supposed to say how we really feel anymore? Is there a book of acceptable dating terms that I'm unaware of? Am I one of the few who still exercise traditional dating practices? If you like someone.. you tell them! I'm quite literal and actually need someone to look me in the eye and tell me these things, otherwise it's one big guessing game. Unless, of course, we're evolving into a bunch of mind readers, then by all means, let me try to guess how you feel about me.
This topic came up with a friend the other day. I was explaining how no one refers to dating as dating anymore and how confusing it is to be single, especially in San Francisco - a city with an unusually high amount of singles with PPS, or Peter Pan Syndrome. I was really curious what his take on all of it was. He explained how it does change and has always been changing - we just have to change with it. It's transitioned from the formal terms of being "betrothed" to "going steady" to "dating" and then to the more casual, and confusing, terms of "hanging out", "meeting up" and "talking." (What does that mean, exactly?)
Is this the new language of love? Are these words supposed to mean commitment? Or have we just (d)evolved into a more casual dating culture, where we put more emphasis on personal needs, career and frivolous fun than we do on courting, dating and building a family to carry on our lineage? Do we really think we can afford to be this selective when it comes to choosing a partner and settling down? Should children be taught these life lessons in schools? Perhaps go to boarding school to learn proper social etiquette? Are we losing the tradition that was so engrained into our grandparents and parents? Or is this all due to technology? Instead of calling someone, we text. Is this really moving in a positive direction?
Clearly, I have more questions than answers, which just reiterates how confusing it all is. So, is this evolution? Or just pure laziness? I guess that's all up to your interpretation.
Megan, Out. [drops mic]