I just recently attended my 10-year high school reunion.
Now, in this day and age of Facebook, Instagram, and other various social media outlets, why would I care about going to a 10-year high school reunion when I already know who's gotten married, who's had kids, or who’s aged poorly.
Yet, regardless of already knowing these crucial details, I decided to go and see if, in fact, 10 years really made that much a difference.
Prior to the event, it had come up in conversation with some friends, (friendships made after high school), how I didn't have a date, and would be going solo. Did they have a point? Was I supposed to arrive with someone on my arm? Would it be weird if I didn't? Suddenly I wasn't so "Ok" with being single.
Regardless, I went all by myself, single, solo, uno, just me. To say I was shaking in my shiny, tan, kitten heels would have been a gross understatement.
I. Was. Terrified! Who wouldn’t be?
I had all of these different scenarios going through my head, taunting me. In my mind, it would either play out like the movie "Carrie" in which I would get laughed out of the auditorium covered in pigs blood OR "Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion" in which I would suddenly remember how I invented the glue on the back of Post-its and fly off into the sunset in a private helicopter.
Clearly, the second ending was more appealing to me since pig’s blood would have totally ruined my dress.
As soon as I got there I was greeted with some familiar faces and hugs. It was nice to catch up. Apparently my non-high school friends were right, everyone either had a significant other or spouse and some even had kids! I guess I was one of the very few who chose career over family. Should I have been focusing more on finding a man to marry and less on traveling the world 3 times?
NAH! I'm not gonna settle for just ANY Tom, Dick, or Harry.
A couple of hours of superficial chit chat, 2 champagne flutes, and several delicious Swedish meatballs later it was time for the classic slide show, for which we were asked to send in old pictures ahead of time. I didn't, so I wasn't expecting much. I was actually expecting to fake smile my way through the whole thing. To my surprise, however, I was actually in two of the pictures. So I felt pretty good about that. All of a sudden I went from being an outsider to feeling like I was in on the joke. It felt nice. However, the more the slide show went on, the more uncomfortable I felt.
I was shy in high school and I didn't participate much in school activities or events. I kept to myself and my own group of friends, which kind of seemed to change every year and I could count them on one hand. Don't get me wrong though, I wasn't exactly a wallflower either. I was completely wrapped up in starring in regional theatre productions AND I did get voted "Most Likely To Have Her Name In Lights," which was pretty cool. I was also chosen to sing the National Anthem at our graduation ceremony, which I totally ROCKED!
But I digress.
The slide show was tough to get through. It brought back all of these memories from, what felt like, another life. I was a completely different person now. I didn't even recognize that 17-year-old girl I was seeing on the projector. (Luckily they were good pictures so I got over that pretty quickly.)
I have to be honest though, I actually went to the reunion thinking everyone would be mingling with each other minus all of the barriers or cliques. But sadly, that wasn't the case. There were still the oddballs (a mix of the drama folk and artsy creative types) the obvious cool kid group (Who, to this day still hang out together and for which this reunion was just a regular party), and of course, the neutral group, which I was part of. We were like the Switzerland of high school cliques. We didn't take sides, or at least, that's how I felt we were. I sure wasn't about to deny anyone a hug, a smile, or a friendly conversation. So why didn't everyone feel this way? What stunned me the most was that I'm actually Facebook friends with a lot of these people who still managed to ignore me.
It's funny, really. Why wouldn't anyone, after not seeing someone for 10 years, NOT want to be friendly or at least say Hi? I know you know me, you know I know you, we know we know each other. What's the problem here? Intimidation? Bad breath? Body odor? Who knows?
Which brings me to my original question - Are 10 years really enough for people to fully mature from their high school selves? Are 10 years really enough to let bigons be bigons? Water under the bridge? Are we adults just 10 years after we graduated? Apparently not. It became clear that although we are almost 30 now, our 10-year reunion was merely just another excuse for binge drinking and partying the exact same way we did back then but this time just older.
Perhaps 20... 25... 30 years need to pass before people really change for the better or worse. Regardless, growing and changing is healthy. It's ok to NOT have the same friends you did back in high school. There are no cliques in life. You choose who you want to be and who you want to be with. It's like resetting the game. A fresh start.
All in and, It wasn't all too horrific. I did get to rekindle some old friendships and hear about how other people have spent the last 10 years. But would I go to another one? Probably not. Unfortunately, 10 years just wasn't enough for me. I’ll stick to the social media outlets for my updates.
Now, in this day and age of Facebook, Instagram, and other various social media outlets, why would I care about going to a 10-year high school reunion when I already know who's gotten married, who's had kids, or who’s aged poorly.
Yet, regardless of already knowing these crucial details, I decided to go and see if, in fact, 10 years really made that much a difference.
Prior to the event, it had come up in conversation with some friends, (friendships made after high school), how I didn't have a date, and would be going solo. Did they have a point? Was I supposed to arrive with someone on my arm? Would it be weird if I didn't? Suddenly I wasn't so "Ok" with being single.
Regardless, I went all by myself, single, solo, uno, just me. To say I was shaking in my shiny, tan, kitten heels would have been a gross understatement.
I. Was. Terrified! Who wouldn’t be?
I had all of these different scenarios going through my head, taunting me. In my mind, it would either play out like the movie "Carrie" in which I would get laughed out of the auditorium covered in pigs blood OR "Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion" in which I would suddenly remember how I invented the glue on the back of Post-its and fly off into the sunset in a private helicopter.
Clearly, the second ending was more appealing to me since pig’s blood would have totally ruined my dress.
As soon as I got there I was greeted with some familiar faces and hugs. It was nice to catch up. Apparently my non-high school friends were right, everyone either had a significant other or spouse and some even had kids! I guess I was one of the very few who chose career over family. Should I have been focusing more on finding a man to marry and less on traveling the world 3 times?
NAH! I'm not gonna settle for just ANY Tom, Dick, or Harry.
A couple of hours of superficial chit chat, 2 champagne flutes, and several delicious Swedish meatballs later it was time for the classic slide show, for which we were asked to send in old pictures ahead of time. I didn't, so I wasn't expecting much. I was actually expecting to fake smile my way through the whole thing. To my surprise, however, I was actually in two of the pictures. So I felt pretty good about that. All of a sudden I went from being an outsider to feeling like I was in on the joke. It felt nice. However, the more the slide show went on, the more uncomfortable I felt.
I was shy in high school and I didn't participate much in school activities or events. I kept to myself and my own group of friends, which kind of seemed to change every year and I could count them on one hand. Don't get me wrong though, I wasn't exactly a wallflower either. I was completely wrapped up in starring in regional theatre productions AND I did get voted "Most Likely To Have Her Name In Lights," which was pretty cool. I was also chosen to sing the National Anthem at our graduation ceremony, which I totally ROCKED!
But I digress.
The slide show was tough to get through. It brought back all of these memories from, what felt like, another life. I was a completely different person now. I didn't even recognize that 17-year-old girl I was seeing on the projector. (Luckily they were good pictures so I got over that pretty quickly.)
I have to be honest though, I actually went to the reunion thinking everyone would be mingling with each other minus all of the barriers or cliques. But sadly, that wasn't the case. There were still the oddballs (a mix of the drama folk and artsy creative types) the obvious cool kid group (Who, to this day still hang out together and for which this reunion was just a regular party), and of course, the neutral group, which I was part of. We were like the Switzerland of high school cliques. We didn't take sides, or at least, that's how I felt we were. I sure wasn't about to deny anyone a hug, a smile, or a friendly conversation. So why didn't everyone feel this way? What stunned me the most was that I'm actually Facebook friends with a lot of these people who still managed to ignore me.
It's funny, really. Why wouldn't anyone, after not seeing someone for 10 years, NOT want to be friendly or at least say Hi? I know you know me, you know I know you, we know we know each other. What's the problem here? Intimidation? Bad breath? Body odor? Who knows?
Which brings me to my original question - Are 10 years really enough for people to fully mature from their high school selves? Are 10 years really enough to let bigons be bigons? Water under the bridge? Are we adults just 10 years after we graduated? Apparently not. It became clear that although we are almost 30 now, our 10-year reunion was merely just another excuse for binge drinking and partying the exact same way we did back then but this time just older.
Perhaps 20... 25... 30 years need to pass before people really change for the better or worse. Regardless, growing and changing is healthy. It's ok to NOT have the same friends you did back in high school. There are no cliques in life. You choose who you want to be and who you want to be with. It's like resetting the game. A fresh start.
All in and, It wasn't all too horrific. I did get to rekindle some old friendships and hear about how other people have spent the last 10 years. But would I go to another one? Probably not. Unfortunately, 10 years just wasn't enough for me. I’ll stick to the social media outlets for my updates.